A little tip for getting through the line faster. I have a jacket with zippered pockets. When I go through x-ray, I put my keys, any coins, my cell phone, and other small stuff in the pockets of that jacket, zip them closed so the things don’t fall out, and put that in a bin. It has always passed screening without a…

I swear there was one with her draped all over a Mercury Cougar (the best), but I can’t find it anywhere. So, second best: Catherine Deneuve for Mercury Monarch. Loved her Mercury commercials, but they didn’t move me to buy one.

Counterweights would certainly improve the drivability of some vehicles. However, for reasons unfathomable, kinja won’t let me post a picture of the “Little Red Wagon” popping a wheelie this morning. Sorry folks.

I’m a foot taller than my wife, so it stands to reason that there ought to be some tall women with shorter men as well. It’s only fair.

“Urea is mainly produced with coal or natural gas as a byproduct of industrial ammonia production.”

The bed of pretty much any pickup truck.  I was allowed to ride in the bed of an El Camino as a kid.  I would certainly not let my children do that.

‘79 Monte Carlo. The reason I haven’t owned a GM car since. Failed tranny. Failed carb. Had the carb rebuilt twice because the first mechanic made it worse. Failed paint. Even the adhesive holding the gasket around the trunk in place would make a mess of your clothes. Too many other things to mention. On the day I…

Hast thou heard of youtube?

What is the point of rust-proofing a car that’s already rusted through?

With gas prices as high and as volatile as they’ve been, I’m surprised the price of Lincoln Navigators has skyrocketed the way it has.

Don’t hog the left lane.

Wouldn’t “while engaged,” be more accurate than “while electing to engage?”

Thanks.  Doesn’t change my mind in the least.

A couple of years ago at car shows where I live, a guy was trying to sell an Olds Cutlass convertible, in poor condition, and with a Chevy motor (a nothing special Chevy motor at that), for an enormous price.

I get that if you have to ask, you can’t afford it. I admit I can’t afford it. So, how much?  Also, people buy those “collectible Jim Beam bottles, so someone must have said, ‘why not?’”

Cool, but how do you watch TV on a cardboard box that kind of looks like a TV?

It’s not that hard, really. I have confidence in you.

Finding things I’ve lost is why I have a wife.

Finding things I’ve lost is why I have a wife.

Little-known fact:  The Grinch died about a year later, due to his enlarged heart.

Clearly, what this country needs is bulletproof thoughts and prayers.