I’ve been playing Planetside since 2004 and this has always been the games biggest folley. What good is strategic coordination on a massive scale when resource allocation doesn’t even matter? There’s no Alamo moments because of this, which means the biggest force will ALWAYS win, no matter the skill level.

Why is this on Deadspin? MAKE WITH THE SPORTS AND PENIS JOKES.

This is why console fanboyism exists.

His douchedom elevates.

I have a ten year old truck. Is it normal to see some oxidation under the dash and on the seat bolts? Or should, even after a decade, I see absolutely none?

The gravest of sins.

Can we start calling him The Magician? Because holy shit.

I’m shaking in my boots.

They make their money through selling their engine licenses. Their games are more like demos of the engine.

I remember being a kid and a crappy game want seen as crappy, just a really difficult challenge. Beating it came with heavy bragging rights, taking polaroid shots of your television to prove it. TMNT was one of those games. Now that I have better judgement as an adult, I can see it really was pretty dumb.

M-m-m-m-MONSTER REDACTED ed ed ed

This is why I admire Nintendo.

Because it’s easy and there’s hardly any repercussions. More often than not, the person has no disposable income and justifies and rationalizes the action by placing the blame on the publisher. Fuck pirates.

US women experience multiple scoregasms.

Maybe refrain from bomb references on this one, Tim.

A Penny Arcade with an ACTUAL PUNCHLINE?! Whoa, I need to sit down.

You must be a lot of fun to hang out with.

As a CBJ fan, I’m Saad to lose Dano.

How many glitches did this one use?