Who is Alex Winston and why am I so lame that I’ve never heard of her before right now!?

Every time something good happens to her, a kitten gets rainbow wings. She is the most magnificent ambassador for art!

These stories have way more heart than the one I just thought of, but I’ll put it here anyway because I’m still startled it happened. I was at a cute hipster cafe in Eagle Rock a few weeks ago when a hipster family came in to eat. You know: mom swanning around, kid making a giant mess and being noisy on her iPad, dad…

I want to be Checkmate Asshole’s new friend. She is the balls. I hope she’s a rich AF doctor type with a jet and an island, and I hope that teacher - who gives all teachers a bad name, thanks a lot, fuckwit - has to teach Driver’s Ed on the weekends.

KITTENS PUPPIES RAINBOWS HEDGEHOGS BABY OTTERS CUPCAKES.

The costumes are fab. Kind of like the ghost of Eiko crawled out of her grave, trailing lace and sinew.

He is extremely nice according to reports. I’ve said this elsewhere in the Gawkerverse but he goes to the gym attached to the school where I work, and students and staff alike have told me many times how friendly and nice he is. Super unusual in Hollywood, especially at the gym!

Not frightening at all. I don’t watch ANY legit scary movies. This is basically Guillermo’s love letter to ‘Wuthering Heights.’ It’s far more thrillerish in a very trope-heavy, literary way than it is scary. Kind of like Coppola’s ‘Dracula.’

I remember reading Bass’s original script and loving it too. It was balls-deep slapsticky awesomeness.

Love the bag, love the shoes, love everything!

DO WANT MUST HAS.

Let’s see...she liked to pretend she was from NY even though she was from Boston. The ONLY food in her kitchen was nuts and soy hot dogs and bottled water (ONLY. Not an exaggeration). Her boyfriend (husband now) and she used to call/text me at like 3 in the morning screaming and cursing at me and then at 8 in the…

OMG she IS a nutjob. I used to work for her. STORIES.

*sending YOU internet hugs*

I don’t know you, but I believe you.

Wait, I didn’t watch, because I didn’t have anything else to do. Was Jeb Bush being serious?

Yeah I’m cool if I never see her face ever again, so long as she keeps cranking out amazing shit with that growly shrieky pitch-perfect tune machine of hers!

Aw, thanks. Sadly she fell and broke her back, and there are complications, which happens when you’re 80 and, well, you fall down. She’s a tough ol’ Mainer, but still. I appreciate the thoughts.

Life lesson of this week: sometimes that whole ‘threes’ thing needs to fuck off. Computer: died. Car: died. Mom in hospital: please don’t die.

If Lindy and Mallory teamed up THE WORLD WOULD ASPLODE.