The statement + the cute squeaky voice + the slight bedhead = I’m dying in the best way possible.

The cheating is certainly 3rd on the crazy list here, after running multiple miles and running a marathon watchdog blog.

I’m in the section going to Canada. Can’t say I’d have much complaints.

At least add a picture of the car with its doors open if your going to talk about them not being scissors anymore. I had to go straight to google in horror thinking I might have to open them like poor people.

Despite this being 2017, it took me a minute to realize you meant the Secret Service and weren’t referring to the Nazi military group.

makes sense to me

oh ok, now i get it

Greg Jennings would be proud.

My family is spread out on reservations from Red Lake to Turtle Mountain. We know what is coming - termination.

I’m torn. I’m a veteran of the 1st Iraq Shit Show and the Cold War. I didn’t join out of patriotism, I was in a crappy small town and I wanted out. It worked. Being the military actually MADE me a Liberal. (Kind of hard to hate people for the color of their skin when you share a life with them, hard to hate…

Well look at the man with the golden fuckin’ sphincter over here guys.

The Cavs are in salary hell because LeBron forced them to sign Tristan Thompson to an absolutely insane contact. The same Tristan Thompson who belongs to LeBron’s agency. And the same contract that gave LeBron some extra cash on the agency side. Well done LeBron, you flexed your nuts and screwed yourself over.

Waiters seems like the type who isn’t superstitious...but is just a little stitious.

Beets? Battlestar Galactica?

im a viking fan that went to college in wisconsin and so i can say that guy’s comment perfectly encapsulates packer fans. they make the most obvious observations (and think they’re brilliant), completely lack self-awareness, and have zero appreciation of the fact that they have the most talented qb of all time on…

So you’re just gonna totally ignore the rest of my comment and be a little dick, huh?

we’ve all already bought “The Hike,” Magary, give it a rest.

used to be you’d go to the dang game as scheduled and die there from exposure and become an ice ghost and get into all sorts of cool adventures where you’d have to fight the Winter Wizard and get the Orb of Haarj to thaw the last thunderbird and ride it back to the waking world but i guess that time is over