David Gest

Abel?

Hank McCoy

Yes, she was unfortunately blinded in the Chicago riots.

Yes. There will be cake and punch.

Well, that was a freebie.

Ecstasy

It sounds like a salad dressing you put on antipasti.

You've got them dead to rights, for sure.

Franklin & Bash (Your Head Right The Fuck In)

The coronary is near the heart, not the penis.

Fails From The Crypt

No surprises, please.

"Thom! Thom, it's Marvin. Your cousin, Marvin Yorke. You know that new sound you're looking for? Well listen to this!"

Homeland Insecurity, perhaps.

Well, the event is on Saturday.

Neon Deion?

Back when I lived in The Big Apple, I used to buy my copy of The New York Times at this charming little newsstand on The Avenue of the Americas.

Based on my experience with the drug, they should have called this The Adderall Diarrheas.

Getting a haircut is one of those things that makes us human.