This is absolutely awesome.

They need to give him a Viking boat funeral.

If you were born in 1994, you’re not far off from still being legally considered a child. So it’s still a little elastic of a definition.

Have the cops plant kilos of coke on the premises of Daddy’s business, then receive an “anonymous call”. Problem solved.

Still, lacrosse? That’s a nothing sport on college agendas.

Why fucking tolerate this shit? Lacrosse isn’t exactly a major sport to begin with.

Well Totti, you’ve etched your name in your city’s history. And your city’s history? Um....not exactly like Milwaukee's.

“People in Rome have other shit to worry about”

.....Twenty-somethings could have watched that game as kids. Your definition of “older folks” is odd.

Oh, that just happened with the Carolina Panthers this week.

Imagine if Peyton Manning went to Tulane, then spent his entire NFL career with the New Orleans Saints, only to not retire last year, but instead went to the CFL. That is the closest I can possibly come.

It’s time to clean fucking house on the IOC.

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but when it comes to civic transparency and trustworthiness, your city was clearly the better choice.

Jesus, the pro wrestling industry chews people up.

Josh. I was saying that the Chiefs should sign Greg Norman the golfer too though. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

Come to the Chiefs, Greg...

That is precisely why they won’t sign him.

The Panthers have three metric fucktons of talent. They’ll be fine.

They are entitled to their views if they ACCEPT THE SOCIAL AND ECONOMIC CONSEQUENCES. Why is this so hard for you to understand?

That’s because you’re a fucking idiot.