I hope she shows up so I can tell her that Justin Theroux is about 900x sexier and more interesting than Brad Pitt is. He is smart, for starters.

I remember she had seizures back when I suggested that Angelina just "happening" to be photographed taking her kids to the zoo was as staged as Heidi Montag being photographed at the beach. Those were the good old days.

Looks like the case ended up exactly where it should have. Jezebel and every other outlet that gave this con-artist coverage in the pursuit of their own agenda should be ashamed of themselves.

I'm not sure what I've just read, but I think I like it.

As a man who has no ass, this gif makes me uncomfortable, jealous and tingly, all at once

HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT CAPTAIN AMERICA LIKE THAT

oooo totally a good one! Or Chris Pratt and Chris Hemsworth... mmmhmmm

This is not bland! Ok, this is actually totally ridiculous and is something I simultaneously try to remember and laugh at every time he's in a movie and something I try to forget ever happened because really.

I said it before and i won't get tired of repeating myself here: MARK is a Jezabel NATIONAL TREASURE

I don't know who Jesse Williams is, but you know what would be hot? An Idris Elba/Idris Elba mashup. I'd like to string HIS bell, is what I'm trying to say.

Not compared to Ryan Gosling, he's not. But Gosling is the gold standard of bland. When it comes to not having facial expressions, he's like the blond love child of Keanu Reeves and Nicholas Cage.

AAaaaaand this is how beauty is subjective. I find Chris Evans bland & Gosling rodent-like. Blurgh. (I also don't find George Clooney or John Hamm attractive).

Now fit Chris Pratt, however? YES! Young Harrison Ford? NOW!

Have you seen.....this?

What is the point of hyperlinking the same Marie Claire article 4 times in one piece? Twice in one sentence! It makes no sense.

Did you just call Chris Evans...BLAND?

If that's what you think of white people, I doubt they're going to want to be your friend. You sound like an awful person.

"But it's kind of hard to do that when you have no soul to start with."

Dear All People,

Or they should have had someone who knew him give a eulogy. That would have been more powerful. Everything Sharpton does has a sleazy aura around it.