Something tells me they’re lying when they call this “3/4ths” size...

Something tells me they’re lying when they call this “3/4ths” size...

And I think he can’t even get it up to pee

a lot of the sciencey-type guys are completely clueless when it comes to interacting with women.

...

Eh, I could care less.

It’s literally cheaper to die in the US than to afford medical care that offers you any quality of life.

Indiana Jones 5 takes place before Indiana Jones 4. Just to screw with us.

As Tumblr continues to grow and evolve...

$20k just so you can take the doors and roof off?

Yeah, this is a good year for cars.

Especially the ex-boyfriend.

You’re in luck! Mahomes won’t have a Sophomore Slump next season, and I’ll put all the money I own on it.

So how was Freebird?

I’ve read this like five times and it’s still not clicking. It it me, or you?

Just to be clear: There’s no fucking way that Chevy or Ford would do this.

Jesus Christ.

Ridiculous design. Now where do you put the dead hooker?

No, NOT voting is what got us into this mess.

What the hell is a spiritual coach?