“That’s what you get for boarding while wearing leggings, punk.”

It’s a pretty luxurious gulag, though.

“The deranged, conspiratorial mindset that compels someone to declare a picture of dead infants a “deep state” hoax will clearly continue merrily on whether or not Trump parrots that particular delusion.”

Amazing that a minority woman actually thinks that Trump is a good guy.

“My god, it’s full of stars!”

Planned Parenthood (and US women in general) are going to have to figure out a high tech way of surviving this administration. I recall there are groups that deliver birth control into Poland via drone, and organizations in Britain that ferry Irish women across the channel for abortions. That’s what we’re looking at.…

I was just thinking how awesome it would be to be either Chinese, German, or Canadian. The US and Britain are going down; they’re done. China’s running the show for the next couple of centuries, Germany will stay a power house, and Canada will stay awesome.

“Those aliens are quasi-immortal symbionts that took up permanent residence in humans from the beginning of our existence as a species...”

ExxonMobil is urging Trump to stick to the Paris Agreement.

Joe: For the last time, I’m pretty sure what’s killing the crops is this Brawndo stuff.
Secretary of State: But Brawndo’s got what plants crave. It’s got electrolytes. Attorney General: So wait a minute. What you’re saying is that you want us to put water on the crops. Joe: Yes. Attorney General: Water. Like out the…

Along with the problematic “Masterful” and “Graceful” parts of their names. One’s going to be a loser and the other’s going to be a klutz.

“confidently stating that in many biblical cases, God wanted women to get raped.”

Especially since he was adorably photographed yesterday while adorably meeting an adorable puppy...named Biden.

I’m guessing the sword is symbolic of his hate group somehow.

I used to use Sears Auto Repair back in the day.

“I was elected to lead. Not to read.”

He’s got a LOT to atone for, what with the teasing of “NEW EMAILS!!” right before the election. He got this jerk elected, and now he has to deal with it. Enjoy your acid reflux, Comey.

You got this guy elected, Comey. Have fun trying to clean up your mess.

On reddit?

Trump irritating 1D fans? Yawn. Wake me up when he steps to Beyonce. The Beyhive WILL destroy him.