I went to dental school with him.

If people would only look to the cookie, all our problems would be solved.

Jackie O. was a great lady. Those are going to be some tough shoes to fill.

Did you tell him it was peed on?

What did you think, she was going to take some of that chalk and…

It's a little lo-meiny

Ukraine is game to you?!

It's a game of world domination being played by two guys who can barely run their own lives.

MOORS!!!!

So, uh, she's just sitting there…and….and, uh, Pachyderm - you remember The Derm. He says, uh…"I'm gonna go up to her." So, we, uh…he, uh picks up the two pieces of pizza, and, uh…then they're steaming hot and they're burning his hands, see, so he - he's juggling 'em. He's juggling 'em, just throwing them up in the…

Buck Naked.

They're the worst.

"A vacation from ourselves." That's what you said.

I would put exclamation points at the end of all these sentences! On this one! And on that one!

Did he make you call him "Maestro"?

I would drape myself in velvet if it were socially acceptable.

They don't like to see empty seats on TV, so when somebody gets up, I just park my caboose on their spot until they get back.

Sleeping with a giant. It's my life's ambition.

I don't see a "white boy!" I see a DAMN FOOL!

My friends, who I don't even like, they won't talk to me. All because I don't
like that stupid English Patient movie.