Oh, it's been done to death.

Maybe I don't use my exclamation points as haphazardly as you do.

Attention Play-Now employees: George Costanza’s handicapped bathroom is now open on the sixteenth floor to all employees and their families.

I would drape myself in velvet.

It's like you're living in the Playboy Mansion! Did she frolic?

Statute.

That's different.

Hey, Lainey, wanna see the horsie?

He's stealing my cirrhosis!

I am special. My mother was right.

Jerry! Jerry! THe most unbelievable thIng haS just happened. It'S too unbelievable! I'm sitting in the coffee shop, I'm talking to Susan - we're talking about shoe laces…so in walks David, right? He walks right tO the table, I iNtroduced him to SusaN, and he says - get thIs - hE says, "Boy you could do a lot better…

Is that it? You're a delicate genius!

I'm better than him.

Why should I pay, when, if I apply myself, maybe I could get it for free?

I put Canadian quarters in the washing machine. I gotta be out by the end of the month.

She grew up in a different world - a simpler world - with loving parents, a beautiful home in the country, and from what I understand, she even had a pony.

I really can't comprehend how stupid people can be sometimes.

Not that hot.

That's simply not true.

There's just no justice. This experience has changed me. It's made me more cynical, more bitter, more jaded.