@Mark 2000: Will Smith! You are invalid.

@TheMisanthrope: No way he hasn't seen it. You better believe I'm forwarding the embarrassing activities of my friend's future-progeny to them the moment they hit the cerebral-net in 2035.

Anybody else think they gave out too much info on that girl who did the lap dance in the post about how they weren't going to give out any info?

@Always Winning: You're from the Upper East Side?

@Achiever: Or 4 Loco. You guys know about 4 Loco, right?

[deadspin.com]

@cromartie: the lesson? Never get married!

@IronMikeGallego: Its terrific.

@AzureTexan: The old "cat-as-condom" trick, eh? Always a winner with the ladies.

I preferred "Stories (about getting blown by a dog) In An Almost Classical Mode" myself.

@Gottliebs Cards: As a Philly-born man living in Dallas, I take the best of both traditions, and shoot at Santa from office windows.

@digikrynary: Its alright if people want to stay fat. MORE TIME TO RUN FROM THE ZOMBIES.

@bevraj of choice: I'm a little TIRED, I'm a little WIRED, and I just want a little appreciation!

@bevraj of choice: most definitely Return to Cookie Mountain by TV on the Radio. What can I say? I'm hip to the music scene from 4 years ago.

@Body By Bacardi: shit, now we all got to go get starred on Gawker. Point #3 is excellent.

@Peter Nincompoop: I'll translate this to Jason Whitlock-ese so y'all can understand:

@Always Winning: I'll listen to Planet Money next week and get back to you. But it seems like the weather is changing for the worse, so I suggest investing in Blue Coal! The Shadow trusts Blue Coal to power his house, and so should you! Who knows what temperatures lurk in the heart of winter? The Shadow knows! And he…

@manoguer: Source?

Could you guys just say that "Tragic death policy" is in effect when you post this sort of story?

@Arthur_Digby_Sellers: I rolled a twelve! So.... Winterspoon Nightstalker, I get my balls in your mouth while you violate me with a foam penis. Unless you roll a saving throw.