@vodkanaut: severing the glenohumeral joint of Matthew Stafford would be one way to gain the powers.

@JanetRenoManchild: Or as JaMarcus Russel calls it, "E'rry day Sunday."

"That's nothing. You should see how hard I can hit one."

As someone said outside the venue after the show, "Average Joes" don't speak at, or go to, the New Yorker Festival on a Saturday afternoon. They stay at home and watch Michigan State beat Wisconsin and remain undefeated, and then they check in on their fantasy teams.

@EddieSuttons SouthernComfort: Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to win the Premiership again. But I fucking love Pederson & Samba , so that works well for me.

@Sheed's Bald Spot: Was this pizza man syphilitic?

@The CFL Allstars: I long for the day where I will sit on my couch, happily waiting for the it to come to me.

@Delonte, Interrupted: When is old enough to hit up my High School neighbors for weed?

@FavreFAIL: I figured I had like a 1 in 5 shot at it, so I'd take it. But miss once, and miss forever.

@bevraj of choice: The Philipines. De nada para su cultura.

@FavreFAIL: Thats Alyson Huber for you.

@Hypnic Jerk: you'll want a carton of demerol.

@Phintastic: The text says lol, but the face says deadly serious.

@vodkanaut: Its also nice to know that the Karen F. Owen read the book, for reasons that will become apparent after you do read it. But its truly a great book. Best book for me though... ever heard of Pedro Paramo? Either that or The Colour out of Space (I know its not a novel).

@Jefferson Short Bus: "It gets better the second time I swear" also doubles as my promise to all women I meet.

@Phintastic: I sort of like the way shes consoling Morgan Freeman though.

@vodkanaut: I'll let my friend Robert Evans explain:

@David Matthews: they are actually all reasonably findable, but hes the Pike. I won't post any more.

@FavreFAIL: Not a woman, but I don't go there for drinks. I've gone a few times with friends, because a gay bar beats no bar. However, the last time I walked in, some bear stood up, pointed at me, and said loudly, "HIM, HIM, I WANT HIM." That just made me laugh, but also realize that when I go into gay bars I'm…

Let's see how many we can ID.