In its own way, your misuse of the term “jumped the shark” to describe the normal athletic age curve is more grating than when someone fucks up the meaning of ironic or literal.

By which you mean you challenge the basic meaning of words as some part of inane semiotic game?

I like you being called “idiot who gets run over by a bus, then shits himself”.

Your mother is going to feel secretly justified when she attends your funeral.

I hope that when the doctors find your cancer, they don’t tell you out of justified spite, you fucking skin filled with shit, writhing around in pseudo-conscious spasms.

Your father failed you. You should murder him.

Maybe he was a bit sick of people completely shitting over his best season in five years, where he was a top five defensive player in the league.

Fuck off, cowardly whiner. Register your protest through ritualised self-mutilation.

Suddenly nothing, Howard is having a great season. He is fifth in the league amongst qualified players in WP48 and is easily having his best season since his penultimate season in Orlando. Per 36 min or per possession, he is actually having the best rebounding season of his career.

I cut my eyes out of my fucking skull to end the pain of how hard they were rolling at your inane bullshit.

I really wish that collectively, we all woke up one morning and killed ourselves. We have the power.

You either know nothing of Clinton’s long support for reproductive rights despite political situations that made that support really unpopular, or you do know but are disengenuous scum.

Pure objectivity does not exist. You want magic to be real.

You have never been in the position to do anything important enough that someone would make the effort to yell at you for your failures.

But wouldn’t a more efficient solution be you getting defenestrated?

Dwight is a top ten defender in the league.

Your father is shit, you are boring and thoughtless shit, find a toilet and drown yourselves together, like family.

I hope your family falls apart and you get all the blame.

God, I wish you were dead.

I hope an asteroid destroys your city. Municipal tribalism is insipid and worthy of death.