“Violence is not the answer..” Cool, too bad about the BILLIONS OF DOLLARS the govt. spends on wars & planting ‘seeds of freedom’.

“follow the rules” - MLK

I’m one up on those jerks, because I also know Baltimore is Elaine’s hometown on Seinfeld.

if i have to hear one more ignorant white person make another The Wire joke, I will lose my mind.

You should just be happy you don’t have Justin Bieber & Orlando Bloom fighting over you, I guess.

It was about 45 hours. Can cut it down to 41 or so if you fast forward all of the Steve Zahn parts.

That first twitter response to Simon is drastically overestimating the number of people who have ever watched anything of Simon’s.

Wow. That’s bold. I mean that’s really bold.

This guys answers aren't even vaguely coherent. Was he stoned when you called or is he really like this?

In the last paragraph, you called Sawyer by his character’s name.

I enjoy the idea that one day he will have named all the bricks lining his cell, and on that day I hope they plaster the walls to be silky smooth.

Ugh. This guy is giving my favorite finger a bad name.

PHEW I should be feeling better soon because i’m a liar and the PTSD is not real...THANKS MS BUTT!!

Reported cellmate:

Second Amendment Woman Liberates Bacon from Tyranny of Absence.

They didn’t even try to make it seem like she’s playing that guitar.

Since when is the Jez Twitter logo white on pink instead of pink on white?? I DONT LIKE CHANGE. But also I kinda like it. It is different right? Am i crazy? Tell me I’m not crazy!

Do I think breastfeeding, or feeding someone, or basically just eating on the toilet, is gross? Yes.

Goddamn I love that movie.

yeah, but it is probably just one enormous rock hard testicle.