Whenever he says “I have a friend who...” or “People are saying...” it really just means he’s about to pull something out of his ass.

“Botts dots”, invented in the 50s by Elbert Botts.  This are the things you know when you’re a native Californian born to an engineer.

F1, coming soon to yet (another) totalitarian state.

Pete Denny should start a YouTube channel where he narrates ALL road rage videos.

It’s like when, in fourth grade, everyone is going to drop their pencils at exactly 2:30. Then only one, or no one, follows through. This one resignee is standing out in front of his barracks right now like, “C’mon guys, I thought we were gonna stick it to ‘em!”

I think it’s just cop mentality: “Nobody tells me what to do; I tell people what to do.”

Why is there a gas cap on an electric bike?

Needs more cocaine.

SIC SEMPER DOMUM!

Prius engine swap?

I learned the traditional way: driver’s ed and sneaking out in my V-dub while my parents were away. My wife, on the other hand, had an interesting path to her license. She’d driven her friends home from high school house parties when they got more wasted than her, but she never took driver’s ed. Then the Army…

No number of fake vents could save it from this fate.

He can always pull the ol’ “I meant to go for my taser... oopsie-daisies”

Take the tool out of the boot and put it into this other hole.  Giggity.

Have an airbag go off in your face after getting smashed from out of nowhere. It’s just a bit disorienting.

Vodka + power drill = errant holes. Don’t ask how I know.

I don’t know why that deserved a star, but star.

To this day, if I smell someone smoking cloves, I am 15 years old and I can hear The Cure playing in the background. Nothing takes me back like that.

Hungover, Torch? You’re grammar in this article get’s a D+.

Mid-engined BRZ!!