It’s such a silly thing to toss out a fun movie over. Who cares about the goddamn Mandarin?

Why wouldn’t we have been excited for Iron Man 3?

(I like Puck from Alpha Flight)

Bars and parties on someone else’s tab—socialism!

Thanks for sparing me the bourgeois mediocrity of New York Magazine’s lousy take on socialism.

the reporter told me multiple times that he decided to do the piece bc he had noticed that everyone around him in media had become a Marxist, & he wondered why.

Why stop there?

He was sooo close to having a point that maybe phone polls aren’t a super accurate way to measure modern America, and then he couldn’t help but rage-piss himself with his “SJW” nonsense. 

About 30% of Americans will back Trump without question on ANYTHING. These are the people who admit to proudly holding racist views in phone interviews. This is the racist core at the heart of America.

I got something that’ll cheer them up:

If you really cared about border security you’d be at the border building the wall yourself instead of shitposting on the internet.

Barack Obama called. He said that you’re a stupid fuckface and that he’s been plowing your mom. 

Gotta think that the Ham Gelatin Manufacturers Association was unhappy with Adam Levine for not showcasing their product as well as he has in days past. 

In a world where I constantly see people continue to drink this stuff despite it being awful and even most dive bars having better beer, I think this is precisely the stupid online fight we deserve. 

It is almost certain the children of the corn will sacrifice Spuds Mackenzie and the Whazzup Guys to the harvest gods in retaliation.

Dump being Dump, he’s managed to paint himself into another corner and this whole Emergency Order thing is the only card he’s still holding. It’s worthless and he knows it in practical terms—any order will be challenged in the courts immediately and absolutely nothing will come of it—but this way he can dance for his…

I do actually feel pretty bad for all the corn farmers because..........

They didn’t ask because nobody gives a shit what you think.  Nobody likes you, if you died nobody would notice or care.  You’re a loser screaming into the void but the only thing you’ll ever hear back is “fuck off!”  You'll expire sad and alone, and the world will be a tiny bit better for it.

I can’t wait until the next Democratic president declares a national emergency, seizes all of the assets of the for profit health insurance companies and sets up medicare for all.