Even if I were the kind of person to have and use a gun, there is 0% chance I would ever fire it into a dark room where my pet was supposed to be. 

They can pry my flip-flops (Skechers, a dreamy foot cloud) off my cold, dead feet.

I grew up with a step and a half brother, and when I talk to other people, they’re just my brothers. The step siblings who tormented me at my mom’s house are my step brother and step sisters. My half brother from her house is just my brother. If people don’t act like family, why on Earth would we refer to and claim the…

I struggle with mental health issues, too, and my kitties have kept me from the edge during the darkest hours. ❤️

I’m sure that kind of thing would give a person a hell of a high, and only make them feel invincible.

Seriously, Trump’s increasingly unhinged Twitters and the stunning irony with with his past Twitters age are the only things getting me through this garbage fire of a presidency. Here's hoping his rage stroke turns into a real one.

My grandma (who was otherwise the nicest person who’d give someone in a hard time the shirt off her back) would always tell us that they’d buy alcohol, and then be too drunk to realize how cold it is and then freeze to death. Imagine my surprise the first time I got super drunk in the winter and alcohol was not a…

Seriously. I could spend $17,000 paying off my credit cards, throwing down first and last month’s rent, and getting a cheap car.

Same. I’ll never forget the way I felt when my stepmom pointed out my tummy sticking out in a two piece. 7th grade.

The two suits I've been involved with buying both included the tailoring. Why would you not? The $20 I spent to make my capris fit my tiny corgi legs was the best money I've ever spent on clothes.

You're definitely coming off that way. What business is it of yours how they conduct their open relationship? There’s no one size fits all, just because assholes like you think you get to write the book on relationships.

Sure it’s possible. It just might take more than “oops, sorry”, especially after what was originally such a shitty response. Like, put in some effort, actually learn something, give everyone some time to get past it, and then sure. But you don’t get to act like a spoiled brat, finally come around with an apology, and…

“It’s funny because if we floated the idea that a white person play a POC, there would be pretty universal agreement that such would be bad.”

He's the Senate Majority Leader. It's like calling Paul Ryan the Speaker.

WTF are you talking about?

It’ll be so fun when he finally escalates to murder and everyone acts like this totally came out of nowhere, like omg how could we have known?!?!?

Oh god shut the fuck up.

Because, if a person wants to be decent, they should look at something more than whether or not she can do X to determine if she should. But if you're fine being a privileged asshole who doesn’t care about anyone but yourself, carry on, Ms. Johansson.

Or, if it’s somehow true that there is not a transman in all of Hollywood who could play this role, how about *a* man. Not a woman dressing up as a man.

Wait, did we know that? I was curious when they first split, but the world is a shiny dumpster fire, so I got distracted and never found out.