OK. Ivanka is daddy’s little whore who’s he’s been furiously pimping ever since he first began noticing her developing teen body. Take away her last name and extensive surgery and she’s merely an average everyday woman with no particularly outstanding characteristics whatsoever.

Fuck off. Ivanka is slime, just like her greasy orange daddy who taught her every trick in his grifting tool chest. If you want to believe in the ridiculous myth she’s always cooing about go right the fuck ahead, as there’s a sucker born every minute, but don’t tell me what to think about that piece of shit or her…

Daddy’s little fraud, she’s as fake as daddy’s ridiculous make-believe bio is. She is not a “businesswoman”, her daddy gave her a “company” to play with. She was never a “model”, her daddy pulled strings to help her pretend she was. She is not “poised” or “moderate”, she is actually contrived and artificial, nothing…

I used to do that so much as a kid! I had this idea in my head that it made me look like the crazy elegant older girls at my dance studio, when realistically I was just a weird kid with frizzy hair walking around on the balls of her feet.

“If there is a wasp, or a slug or something...”

I just love this.

That’s one forge best insights into goose psychology I’ve seen.

Then you are going to have to incredibly fast in bed.

you’re a genius

good point, omg now i want brownies

This deserves more stars than it’s getting.

yeah but that defeats the purpose of the “killing time” aspect of the brownies because you’re NEVER going to have sex while brownies are baking lest they get overbaked and ruined so in conclusion just bake brownies and eat them; don’t invite boys over; more for you

I’ll never look at a roast turkey the same way again.

“The Beast With Two Side Dishes”

well whenever you want to start up again, if you prep a chicken you can trick the sex into happening and once it’s over you can send your lover out the door with a fully roasted, intact chicken, everybody wins

the circle is complete.

then you cant have sex im sry

Whole, roasted chicken might be better than sex, just sayin’.

But I’m starving, Kate, you’re pleading. I need a little snack before the dinner. Well, that’s what the giblets are for. Once you’ve put the chicken in the oven, throw ‘em in a pan with a little olive oil, salt and pepper and sear them real quick. Split the liver with your chosen partner because you’re not a monster.

Reading the Autobiography of Malcolm X as a kid, I always wished I could play the numbers. I know the “Detroit Red” years weren’t supposed to be the part you remember, but an underground lottery that people actually won?!?? (I was 12 or so). HOW AWESOME IS THAT???

Have you seen Narcos? I thought it did a decent job of telling a great story about what a complex and powerful personality Escobar was without ever glorifying him or glossing over the gross crap he was responsible for.