Please, don’t let Gronk hear this is a thing.

The self-proclaimed “Manalyst”? There’s no way anyone could have seen this coming.

He doesn’t need the slice when he’s all forearms and quads.

Can he come out of retirement to beat the shit out of Yordano Ventura, too?

This is really a common occurrence. Everyone keeps on asking me how many fingers they have, and I don’t have a fucking clue.

That’s badass.

I definitely thought the headline was going to refer to every opponent’s possession in James Harden’s career.

Her facial expression is something you’d call “Trailer park not impressed”

He was always more normal than his cousin, Screech.

Blame Soulja Boy. This is just a cover of his track.

That dog is circling around like guys do when they don't know whether or not to break up a chick fight.

He asks a lot of players this question.

jlin7 : Kobeeeee...what's up?!

"Repeated attempts to reach him were unsuccessful until approximately an hour before puck drop, when Kane answered his cellphone and said he wouldn't be playing against the Canucks that night."

It appears banging whores was his only motivation. Also, diseased vag benefits short game immensely.

Beat your fiancé, beat your kid, beat your dog, fine, but God forbid you beat up your own liver.

The animal cruelty charges might get him a couple games. Weed though? Ban him from the league.

I have small, feminine wrists, so I always had a problem finding touchscreen gloves that could fit my hands. These ones from Muji are the best I've owned so far. They are mittens, so they may not be as warm as some of the other options, but I live in Canada and they do a decent job of keeping my hands warm.

I have small, feminine wrists, so I always had a problem finding touchscreen gloves that could fit my hands. These…

At a later activity held at a strip club, Harbaugh went by a variation of the same nickname: "Captain Cumback".

Whatever, the entire city of Chicago was "confused and uncomfortable" during Mike Ditka's entire tenure.