If it can get down from the shelf and sit in the middle of the room, what makes you think that it can't crawl it's way out of a landfill and find you?

When my grandmother was a little girl during the Great Depression, apparently talking dolls were The Thing to Have, but they were too poor. So when I came along, she was determined that I should have one. Enter Myrtle, a baby doll who, when squeezed, would giggle, "Ha ha ha HA, mama!" Three year old me was cool with…

My mom gave my daughter a porcelain doll when she was probably 8. She hated the creepy thing...they eyes followed you everywhere. She wanted to get rid of it, but resisted, because it was from my mom for years. In her early teens she finally threw it away.

That's enough internet for me today.

I'll complain about trash if I want. You're free to skip my comments.

Fuck Andy Cohen for coming up with this shit and then for repeating it over and over.

We're never going to be able to have nice things, are we?