they don't generally brut it about, but most 'Stralians have a 'roo scrotum-bottle opener, usually next to the Sydney funnel web spider on a leash.

and using decades old discredited 'junk' science too. sorry, it's a slow day and I'm bored.

old vet here: they'll always be loaches to me.

Further: friend of mine went to Moscow 6, 7, years ago to open a very fancy movie theater. Came back with some hilarious taxi stories. Seems every time he got in a cab, he got robbed. After the second time a driver pulled over and demanded his wallet at knifepoint, he started carrying an extra, empty wallet, with cash…

when I lived in Taipei, all us wai guos were warned about fake cabs. Don't ride alone; check the back before you get in; see if the door handles work, the window rolls down, etc. Getting robbed or assaulted was a real thing.

Hawaii. People really get turned around.

When I lived in Japan, the bosozoku riders on their 250 cc bikes with no mufflers drove me nuts; my wife told me "shikata ganai", it can't be helped. It seems one time a zoku being chased by police died in the chase and Japanese cops could only 'pursue' at about 5 mph. Gotta say, it was pretty funny seeing one or two…

On the other hand, Ford has it's e-frankenbike, the possibly ugliest solution for parking-lot-to-Starbucks ever.

No. Only two people there, and you know what they say: two's company, three's a sandwich.

I'm torn between the At Home Meth Kit and the cake set.

or... drop dead fucking?

This is getting too absurd; it's time there was a cease-fire in the Booty Wars and we returned to a time when celebs kept their clothes on.

are you f'n serious? I'd love to see a Blackhawk over my house ; I'd pay good money to see it; in fact, millions of people pay just to see Blackhacks on a movie screen. The only way this could be better is if they fired a rocket that burst open and showered the kids with candy while the adults were screaming and…

It gets worse: in Hawaii, I caught a ride home from work one night with the pothead busboy, the macho pot-growing surfer dude; he pulled out a j-gar and we proceeded to get destroyed. That car looking like smoky freight train rollin' down the tracks. He pulled onto Hui Rd F and headed up; then we saw something small…

1977, Anchorage AK: I'm in my 74 rotary engine Mazda truck, so sweet; lots of horse power, MacFerson strut suspension, rack and pinion steering, roll bar, custom paint and wheels, flared fenders. I'm late to pick my G.F. up from work and at a stop light on top of a hill; when the light turns green, I take off like a…

As some guy said, All you paranoid people who look in the shower, what's your plan if you find someone there?

Damn it! My middle finger was my second favorite organ!

All this and more for cyclists, only without the body armor.

or the Latin gigalios who are called El Jefe.