Up next: A Mitsubishi light truck, with a 3.0 liter diesel with 254 HP and 480 ft/lb.

BMW — officially cashing in on the mid-life crisis by teasing you with your daughter's cheerleader friend.

@damnElantra: Yes. yes you did.

@UDMan: Exactly - people remember the GM truck diesels, or the Rabbit that couldn't outrun a determined butterfly.

Who cares if the speedometer font is hard to read — it's a dead-on resurrection of the font from my old '65. Spooky, almost. That's how you tie in history and design language.

@ebm14: Why would you need AWD? This has no more need for that than an XB does. Which, if you look at the C-pillar, this kind of resembles...

Those aren't ladder bars. They're frigging suspension bridges.

My cousin just moved to Portland with her boyfriend, living downtown and going carless. She's biking to work.

Good Lord.

Giving that guy a hard time, and letting Leno slide on wearing a denim shirt? Okay... let's talk about the car.

Damn, man. Beaten to the punch by the absolute master.

Tightening the last bolt on the re-chromed grille, you lean back to admire the Volvo. Years of parts-hoarding, 3 flights to Sweden, a divorce resulting from the affair with the blonde at the parts store in Stockholm — all of that is behind you. Time to revel in the glory that is your 1800. The paint is flawless, as…

As a manual wagon owner, I would buy it. Tomorrow. Please.

Beautiful... and every last model, a contender in PCH.

Glaring proof that most pickups are no longer really used as farm tractors: seen a late-model with a stump-pulling granny gear lately?

Sure, but did Kramer change the coolant?

Obviously a human interest story. You know, the ones about puppies, or dolphins, or baby horses, or perma-drunk rednecks with nicotine-yellow fingers and upper lip, wearing the same shirt from last week.

My old '78 Spider drifting in the back of my mind, I get all buzzy when I see those Pinninfarina lines - a sensation quickly followed by a sick lump of dread at the possibility of dealing with another Italian electrical system.

@HeeeeyJake: I can haz Kool-Aid?

Are we sure that wasn't a soccer mom, dissatisfied with the puny SUV's available, running errands after dropping the kids off at school?