Hey, MINI: Two seconds is an eternity on an autocross course.

"designed with both cars in mind"...that course is a joke.

Careful, Honda. Lil Wayne got locked up for having too much swagger.

@Matt Combs: For me, "properly maintained" meant two nights of wrenching for every three days of driving. But you could boost the shit out of that 4G63.

This article is much like the list of ten awesome things to do in Marysville, Ohio.

This story is bunk. GM CEO master puppeteer Barack Pelosi is promising (demanding) that the Volt is available on time, launch issues be damned.

It's a toss-up between a beige 4-door Mercury Monarch with zero options (which was a badge-engineered Granada, like the title photo), and a Chevy Vega. The Monarch did nothing wrong other than being completely devoid of any soul. The Vega looked kind of cool, blue with a white racing stripe and chrome wheels. But…

Undead Enzo Ferrari just crawled out of his grave and is looking for the owner of this car.

This guy probably had a fit when Dale Jr changed his number.

No 1st generation DSM owners?

Drivers of their choice? Prediction: Mini (BMW) shows up with Hans Stuck and Porsche brings Walter Rohrl.

Try to appear in public not wearing a flatbill or that ridiculous goatee?

Mitsubishi Raider: Barf.

Up next in the Ohio legislation: racial profiling allowed if performed according to vehicle paint color. Don't drive brown, tan, or yellow cars.

Wow. I wonder, what was the inspiration for that green color?

"It's a handsome design..."

I do not understand. Aussies are all about burnouts. They pack stands full of Cooper's-soaked fans for burnout competitions, build vehicles specifically for performing wild burnouts, and discuss burnouts on internet forums dedicated to discussing burnouts.

Toyota Corolla / Geo Prizm. NUMMI built millions of them, but they are completely invisible unless you actively look for them.

GM V8s are fantastic for this reason. They might not always run great, but they will start most of the time, and give plenty of warning before they completely fail. I have driven a rod-knocking, coolant-consuming, water-n-oil milkshake Small Block Chevy from Northern MN to Southeast MI. Many quarts of oil and…

It doesn't matter if she or the dog were driving. Whomever caused the crash is a dumb bitch.