If 2016 were a four-word statement, it would be this:

pictured: chemtrails.

True, maybe we should have gone with an Asian Jackie O.

“I’m not a racist — those are only things I say from my true heart-of-hearts in private to my friends!”

can you bump pay for a database?

Pssst, they have databases for this useless shit now.

Everybody think they have a right to pass judgement on others and then use that to make themselves feel better.

I don’t have a strong opinion on her decoration of the Bible itself, but kiddo...

How about, as my mama always says, “It’s none of your beeswax.”

I mean, sure, she could probably find some gold-digging asshole.

You live a sad life, when your first thoughts upon hearing about a newly engaged couple is inevitably about domestic abuse and him being ‘unworthy’, as if this was an 18th century affair between a royal and a commoner. Yikes!

Why are we taking a crap on them?

There is more to reddit than the subreddits that the writers at Jezebel like to hate-read.

She didn’t know her son was dead yet, so that wasn’t a trigger. Though it’s easy to assume that there was some kind of escalation going on that pushed him to suicide and her to murder in the same approximate time frame.

The California climate is super friendly and easy to talk to.

Counterpoint: California is responsible for awful techbros (te only other people you hear throwing around terms like “utopia” btw), the Real Housewives, a fairly alarming number of anti-vaxxers, and quite possibly the highest concentration of Scientologist. The whole extreme homelessness and insane gentrification at…

How’s that affordable housing and homeless population crisis working out for you guys?

That settles it then.

I feel like “very insightful” is some holiday generosity, but sure.

A college degree doesn’t guarantee individual financial success, particularly with so many shitty degrees being offered. Colleges sell a lot of bad degrees that aren’t of any value, but if people are willing to buy them, they’re more than willing to meet demand. And they are.