What a special moment for him! It's not every day that Derrick Rose gets proposed to.

I agree, he played a marvelous first base.

Barry, you're vastly over-simplifying the process. The Redskins don't just "get" jokes. First, they have to be free-agents. Next, you negotiate the contract. Then, you get them.

I love how it's an unacceptable, nigh-immoral brand of selfishness (maybe not for you personally, but for many others whose arguments share the broad outline of yours) for a player to insist upon being paid the fair market value for his work, but when a team callously cuts a long-tenured player for losing a step or…

Are you a Knicks fan? Because I think you need a bigger boat.

I forgot that the nba had a wild card game... You have no idea what you're talking about.

Lee Trevino bet him $500 he couldn't hit three balls with one swing.

Sure. Send them the examples you obviously know exist and have access to and are not just assuming exist because you are, yourself, a tea party asshole to tips@deadspin.com.

I'm just surprised he didn't put her in a stranglehold

they just missed out on their first time touching a black person.

[phone rings]

Come on, the HOF is still relevant as long as they make sure the all-time leaders in MVP awards, Cy Young awards, hits, home runs and games played are all enshrined. Oh, wait...

Nelly, someone, someone, Justin Bartha, Larry David, and a young Alfred E. Neuman

When Ken reaches to pull my hair there is nothing to grab. Meanwhile I have a fistful of Prince Valiant bangs. I win.

That's weird because that's where we're typing from.

MOP BOY: I'm traveling as fast as I can!!

Jeez. Probably time to pull the plug on this Schiavo guy.