im in texas and went out yesterday.  they only allowed 3 tables per section all spread out.  i sat outside since it was beautiful yesterday. but they had 3 outside, 3 in the bar area with the bartop closed, 3 in the regular area. everyone masked up and they took your temp at the door before letting you in

I saw a post about a woman who wears a mask with tiny little dicks on it. When people remark on the dicks she tells them if they can see the dicks, they’re too close so they need to back the fuck off. I’d love to have a mask like that.

Dear lord why did you go out for brunch? And once you saw how non-distanced it was, why didn’t you leave?

Why? You really went to brunch out already? 

If he were making high end masks that actually helped more than the cheaper masks, then it would bother me. It would be like rich people getting better health care (which, of course, happens and is terrible.) But, these masks will do the same job as one you can buy on Etsy or Amazon or whatever, so I don’t care. It’s…

Nope. Total non-apology.

Good point. It’s still better than usual, because usual is so awful, but it’s not an actual apology.

Nah, he should spend as much time in the White House as possible now

If he or his boss is worried about a mask spoiling their appearance or projecting weakness, might I suggest using a clear plastic bag with a rope or big rubber band tied tightly around the neck?

Someone should have told him that, unlike AIDS, you CAN get this one from kissing your Mother.

that’s the thing. this baby thing is super niche, which on one hand would make it expensive, and on the other- who’s paying that much for it unless they’re renting royal jewels for the shoots?

I would be interesting to see the budget breakdown, but if the costumes are custom designed and made, plus models, hair and make-up, appropriate compensation for all the other people involved, a sizeable cut for herself and the extra she needs to build in for self-employment taxes and fees, I can see it particularly…

Or how short a period of time that those peas and carrots actually live in the digestive tract? 

Yeah, I’m wondering if she’s including her own fee in that figure, which I’m sure was actually quite high at the peak of her career. I feel shoots that are that expensive are usually commercial productions that employ teams, models, and multiple sets, are shot over several days, and bankrolled by companies withe…

Babies are notorious on-set divas. Do you have any idea how much pureed peas and carrots they demand from craft services?

Don’t forget paying the models. 

How much do you think a baby goes for on the free market? It’s not like you can just buy one and be done with it - they don’t stay cute forever, so you have to keep purchasing new inventory.

it takes about $250,000 to $350,000 to produce the kinds of shoots that I do

Butter have loved than lost.

I will say that since discovering it, I have been irrationally invested in Trader Joe's cultured, salted butter from Brittany.