Don’t forget these affronts to all things holy.

Sleekness. Of. The. Body.

Red Solo Cup

Driver knows right from left!

Real people would say something along the lines of....”and you expect me to take Tucker, Tanner, Taylor and Tyler to soccer, violin and Kumon in that dinky thing? How is a car safe these days? And what will my friends think when I roll up in the Panera parking lot in this dinky thing? Whats that big shiny one over…

The ones that don’t recognize this as the Boulevard

Hyperbole is that thingy Michael Jackson used to sleep in right?

Sub 540 credit scores need rides too

Not anymore. With casinos plopped down in cosmopolitan locales like Chester, Bensalem & No Libs. Theres no reason to run that speeding ticket/toll gauntlet called the AC expressway to just to gamble in the hood

My old girlfriend from Oklahoma was going to fly out for the dance but cant because shes doing some modeling right now

Thats due to the rims and the sleekness of the body

You’d surpised how muddy the infield lots can get at the Radnor Hunt

Relying on the same skid banging chuckleheads the can’t read a BOL to ensure the Tesla trailers are plugged and charging for drop & swaps. Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight

How much can the Park Avenue emit in the 30 miles a week it travels between the Supermarket, CVS, Bridge Club and Church?

Is playing professional soccer the vocation of said bench players? Or did the Galaxy pick these guys up in a Home Depot lot?

Costco’s on the case...wait those are couches. Anyway off to Starbucks for my hand job

If the years of Denis Leary’s shit-talk ads for Ford have taught GM anything, theres little to do in the advertising arena that will come back to bite them in the ass

Mostly off the shelf components from the Caravan. Instead they did the Caliber

Crossovers are cool though. Could you imagine the horror if you were seen leaving Yoga or Panera in a wagon? And what would the other moms say if you rolled up to Tucker, Tanner, Taylor and Tylers soccer games in a wagon or gasp, a minivan. Will somebody think of the housewives!

At least we know what rock his liar for hire crawled out from under