Chocolate-covered strawberries are good. The trick is to eat the whole strawberry in one bite. Just jam that sucker into your face hole up to the green part and chomp down. The only real sin is that the companies that sell them usually go for size over quality and the strawberries aren’t juicy or flavorful enough.…

Disney’s memory-holing of Song of the South was so thorough that a lot of Millennials don’t even know this movie exists. (Notice I said “a lot” and not “all”.) I read a review of the new live-action Dumbo that referred to the crows in the animated version as “the most racist thing Disney ever did” and the writer,…

What also never gets old is the perma-butthurt little trolls who flock to every comment reminding them of what colossal failures they are, still attempting to squeak out some kind of BUTBUTBUT IT WAS TOO A BAD MOVIE defense through mouthfuls of chicken tendies. Stay in the greys losers, I’m not going to get you out by…

I couldn’t help feeling a little weirded out by it, but I recognize that’s completely on me. The fact that Arya went to Gendry and was like “We’re probably gonna die, let’s bone” was cool, though.

BLAH BLAH BLAH CUM TOWN BLAH BLAH

Can we all take a moment to chuckle at the utter failure of various “alt-right” shitlords who attempted to tank this movie’s Rotten Tomatoes score, predicted it would fail at the box office, and boycotted it (thus depriving Marvel of about $74)? That never gets old.

See: Roy Cohn.

Kinda bummed he didn’t mention my personal favorite tidbit from the report: Trump flipping his wig over Don McGahn taking notes, what lawyer takes notes, Roy Cohn didn’t take notes, and McGahn shooting back “I’m a real lawyer, I take notes”. Henceforth I will always refer to him as Real Lawyer Don McGahn. Him and…

You don’t hire Andy Daly for the little 2-second scenes he’s had thus far, so I’ve been waiting for some kind of shoe to drop, but that still took me by surprise.

My immediate family is neither particularly Christian (as a matter of fact my stepfather is Jewish) nor does it contain small children, so we (myself, my parents, and the brother that lives here) have a collaborative dinner with a Honeybaked ham and call it a day. My contribution is deviled eggs and a cake, both of…

BLAH BLAH BLAH CUM TOWN BLAH BLAH

All hail the new mayor of Lurlene, IA! “Novelty mayors are Iowa’s number one source of income.” “Is that a mayor?” “No, that’s just a cat. This isn’t Nebraska!” I’ve never seen anyone as consistently delightful as Sam Richardson is on this show, especially contrasted with the noxious assholes he’s surrounded with.

I started Charles Cross’ biography of Kurt Cobain, Heavier Than Heaven, coincidentally on the 25th anniversary of his death. Or not totally coincidentally; I bought it a couple of months ago and decided to hang onto it for a while, but I certainly hadn’t planned to start it that night. It was good, but it made me feel…

That explains Juicero

Between John Carreyrou’s book, the podcast, and the HBO documentary, I think I’m all full up on content about this saucer-eyed grifter and the billion dollars in VC she hoovered up. I had a cancer scare last year and by the time it was over (one tumor removal and hysterectomy later), I’d had what seemed like gallons…

Clearly. He was greyed and I was just going to ignore him, but some twit starred his first comment. He’s also very, very, very upset that he thinks I called him a nazi, which says more about him than it does about me.

Nah. I said people who were attempting to manipulate the film’s score without having seen it, based solely on the fact that it had a primarily black cast and that hurt their little nazi fee-fees, and who admitted as much in their dumb little message boards, were alt-right losers.

That is not even remotely what I said, as evidenced by the fact that I didn’t say it.

Someone recently starred an old comment I made on an article about Black Panther from just before its release, about how the usual alt-right losers were trying to tank its Rotten Tomatoes score. Which gave me a good chuckle, especially when I was reminded how one of the aforementioned alt-right losers had replied to…

A friend gave me one of his turntables (he collects them like I collect old cameras and I guess he’s doing the Marie Kondo thing) and I’ve been having fun on the weekends scouring local secondhand stores (no shortage of those in rural Louisiana) for vinyl. Sure are a lot of Cat Stevens and Steely Dan records out there…