Some of my favorite quotations from Katharine Hepburn and her mother, Katharine Houghton Hepburn:

My Saturday night included being doubled over in pain with a UTI/Kidney stone combo while new guy proved himself again by trucking me to urgent care, sitting through me writhing in his car, sat in the waiting room and searched the drug store for needed drugs. He made me coffee and breakfast this morning as I laid on…

When I got my married my mother, being my mother, was flipping out because we HAD to have the county confirm with us, in writing, that they received our filled out/signed form/license. Apparently when her parents got married, the county either never received their license or lost it. So years and years later when they…

My sophomore year roommate was from Buffalo and was always talking about Wegmans before we got them down here. I was like ‘nahhhhh, they can’t be that special, it’s just a grocery store’.

Leave my precious, holy, special Wegmans ALONE YOU FILTHY ANIMALS.

The fact I have to get my ass back out to the burbs after work is the only thing keeping me from taking home most of a pig many evenings.

All the more Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream for me. 

Mealy, sand textured gym socks. 

The chain restaurant choices that surround the Reading Terminal confound me on a regular basis. I was practically raised on the food from that place, so you give me $40 and I’ll come out 100 lbs heavier, full of Bassetts ice cream, at least two cups of Old City Coffee and whatever else sings to me while I push past…

Me too. I look like I have eyebrow mange. :/

Nope. Nope nope nope.

I can’t do spin classes anymore because I haven’t found a single one that doesn’t have a ‘FIGHT YOUR BATTLES HERE. YOU CAN SCALE THAT MOUNTAIN. YOU ARE A WARRIOR’ bullshit being spewn the whole time.

We have slow times at work and visitors are like ‘AREN’T YOU BORED?!!!’

oh vomit. 

I got used to using men’s deodorant after living with a man for so long, so I just keep buying it now that I don’t. But it’s also SO MUCH CHEAPER. New dude was confused when he saw it on my dresser and I had to explain that it’s like $2 cheaper a stick compared to women’s. Plus, then men’s stuff smells better. 

I have a very different world view now days. I’ve had enough bad/shit for a lifetime. I’m not taking any of it anymore and I will do what I need to in order to ensure I can enjoy my life as best as I can from now on. 

He’s such a fucking hypocrite. He talks all the time about how people should have interests outside of work, but then is like your old boss.

Oh no, my chief (who is a lovely woman) would NOT have oked this. The only reason he probably did this is because my chief is away. If she had been around he never would have pulled me in. He’s trying to flex his muscle while she’s away and it’s mostly just making everyone hate him more.

The dude I’m seeing suggested that he break his toe, so the lego plan could expedite that!

They are just little pork choppies.