Not to get all serious in a Funbag comment section, but when reading the letter from the soon-to-be-father: the reality is that the world is better today than it ever has been before. Not a little better, either; it’s a hugely, wildly, amazingly better place than it has ever been before.

If you use Do Not Disturb after 10, why do you care if someone texts you after 10?

It’s the city that never sleeps! Where else can you buy a single cigarette from a guy on the street at 4 am?

What I liked best about this Funbag is the “appetizer for an appetizer” question comes after the “It sucks to be called fat” question. America!

Aaaawww that’s sweet.

I agree 100%. You can’t do everything for a child then cut them off with no foundation to build off from. By the time a kid is 18 and ready to live outside the family home, they should know how to cook, clean, do their own laundry, make their own bed, pay their own bills and handle their own day to day business. Obviou…

This is really important, not just to teach them independence but also how to get along with people. The goober has to take money to the counter himself when we go to shops, and go up to the counter in cafes to ask for something. It’s had a great impact on his socialization, and since he’s so cute standing on his…

Excuse me, Drew’s room is on the second floor and his parents’ house doesn’t even have a basement.

It’s fucking amazing to me that spending at least $11 billion to improve commute times is more politically viable that just adding real mass transit to an area desperately in need of it. 

They took all my roads and shared them with everybody else.

Member of Omega Psi Phi since 1992. 3rd GenerationThis shit is tired. I have two sons and I wouldn’t want them to join my organization. Words I never thought I’d type. You can’t scream “Black Lives Matter” while contributing to the genocide of our own.

Hazing culture can’t die fast enough.

This is heartbreaking.

My wife is a teacher, so a bunch of her friends are teachers. They don’t yell at kids, because they actually keep up with the latest research and know that shit doesn’t work.

Their skyways don’t have random stabbings. They’re so cute, pretending they’re a real city, with their affordable housing and single family houses.

I can't believe I'm siding with the awful NCAA but it's not their fault that mormons are whackos. 

This is some serial killer shit

yes.

Your gifs are intriguing to me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter

Doesn’t everyone eat sausage links with their hands?