The seventies are over. You can do the hustle back to your shoe closet of shame.

I love Martha but I’m not feeling her gigantic ugly truck.

Hold a light bulb over your head and tell your friend you have an idea. Tell them it came out of your ass.

Are you Donald Trump? I admire your work in comedy.

That’s his name on dlisted. lol

Perfect! I’m literally and figurately laughing.

My cat is Scottish. LOL I think that the tone there is very accurate.

Ginger Hobbit, please.

Tori Spelling should play Tori Spelling.

yeah she sounds scary

I’m really sensitive to manipulation and I don’t want them to explain. I do not ask. Even if they do it in messenger. There was this woman on my twitter who would write things that seemed like personal messages. “I still think about our times together” or “You didn’t have to leave me like that” and she had like 9,000…

WEEL I GUESS YOU GOT WHAT YOU WANTED!

If you’re saying you do see liberals as subhuman, you might be a fascist? If you’re using the methods of the Nazis you might be an Israeli.

It’s not that I wouldn’t drink it but I can’t see a fountain as the optimum way to serve a margarita. The whole fountain thing seems unsanitary in the first place, but also a margarita needs a certain slushiness that I think would be hard to get in a fountain. Also, putting things in fountains seems corny, like you’re…

You outed yourself as a jerk. You got someone fired because no one trained them to do the job. You walked in there like a smug asshole and now you’re trying to still make it their fault.

Except you have no idea who or what I am. I guess liberal is another way to say “subhuman” for you.

Kelly Ripa here: an actual star

Like when they allow the Hamas animals to fire thousands of rockets

They say “How can you love anyone else if you don’t love yourself,” and Taylor Swift is so in love with herself that she probably has the most capacity to love others, especially those who allow themselves to be lifestyle accessories. He’s her new Miss Buttons or whatever she calls that cat.

I think it depends. There is a tradition in country music of wearing these outfits and that’s okay, but they should only do it if they have the style to pull it off. Dwight Yoakam should wear a cowboy hat but Garth Brooks should not. One looks like he stepped out of a 1960’s fashion shoot and the other looks like some…