The Onion AV Club
Merely exchanging Long Protein Strings.

Agreed, the Dolphins are annoying, but Brady having that record would have been infinitely worse. And Spygate was freak'n serious.

If I ever need life saving surgery and just before the doctor knocks me out I see he's wearing any piece of pats merch I will get off the table and yell "18-and-ONE shat-for-brains!" and then lie down. I do not care the consequences. That's how sweet that was.

Tastes like piss!

the NES game was an oddbird. It held… okay to the plot, but not super tight (I think you got Robin's Father's sword from a boar or something), diverging for extra gameplay in several places. But it had a really unique Gauntlet-inspired mass battles, complete with friendly NPCs, a Zelda-esque overhead mode which most…

That is one of the only realistic things - in medieval England, Christmas was a rowdy celebration with very little church on it. It was canceled more than once, including during the Cromwell era. It would have been a pretty vicious punishment.

that one of Mel Brooks' worst is better than this film speaks to its level of gah.

I just still can't get past the last line, the fourth wall breaking when Tuck looks at the camera and tells us we're wasting good celebration time…. gah. I hated it as a kid and I think I hate it more now.

Oh fark, CHEATUM THE EVIL MIDGET.

the trick to a really good JR impersonation is you have to VERY slightly stun the side of your face and let it drag just the tiniest bit.. it might be a little insulting to him but it does make the difference between "Oklahoma cowboy" and "Jim Ross."

I like your problem solving but you're no where near close and I won't indulge you the answer because I don't want to out any of my family who are still in the business. But because I know I'm torturing you, I'll at least clarify that this show was not for WWE, the special appearance by Andre was not connected to WWE…

That's as bad as a pair of brothers in the Warcraft universe named "Rend" and "Maim". Gee, wonder how those two are going to turn out….

I use to have a co-worker who would give Hank Hill's "Dammit Bobby" to me all the time. Hated it. Guy was a bully. Always soured me to a show I didn't need to be soured to much to start (yes, more Texans, that's what I need…)

Cena's an amazing wrestler who is held back by his character. If it were the territories days, I'd be recommending he pick up stakes and get a fresh start elsewhere. Sadly, not an option now-a-days.

because how often in life do you get to say or hear that phrase said with the complete scincerity that only good ol' JR can put into a call

Wrestling is only fake if you consider every other scripted show on TV fake. So being in the industry, I hate the term. Wrestling is scripted. You'd have to be pretty gullible to think otherwise. Now, is it LOUSY scripted entertainment? With WWE, often yes.

hehehehe, no, I'm not Samoan. But out of respect for some of my family who are still in the business I don't name drop.

Yeah, that's a long sad case. Von Erichs were gods in their area in the 70's and 80's.

You're probably boring.

I approve of your list as well. I do think SS92 is a bit overrated for that one match, but I'll accept it.