Jaaanet Weiss, Jaaanet Weiss
Every morning you greet me.
Strong and white, clean and bright,
You look happy not to be playing with Stephen Malkmus.

This is why we have robotic masochists.

The show has always been best when it was as weird as possible. This season really got bogged down in mundane suburban anxieties. The scenes of them sitting on the couch in the living room watching television are the worst part of the show. Why not do an episode where we see Ruxin deal with life in Korea? Or Taco…

How did a lifelong fuck-up get into a position to have access to classified documents? Or get hired as a professor at Washington University? Or poison the CIA station chief in Islamabad? And most importantly, why would the US Ambassador to Pakistan be married to a lifelong fuck-up? The actual US Ambassador to Pakistan…

It was the verbal equivalent of this: http://i.imgur.com/PcXC0Ek.jpg

That's Grand Central Terminal. Penn Station is a soviet elementary school full of dying rats.

Sometimes I scroll down to the bottom of the comments and look for another section of comments that comment on the comments, because the comments are the real content.

Last October I went to a show at UCBLA that was billed as "Two Comedians Doing Comedy." No names, no context. $5.

Is she Maria (Bamford) von Trapp?

It's interesting from a historical perspective, but it doesn't really matter in terms of the work itself.

It matters less how Superman was intended to work, and more how he actually was used. George Reeve, Christopher Reeves and Henry Cavill don't exactly stand as arguments *against* Aryan ideals, and "Clark Kent" is about as Anglo as a name gets. Also, the persistent Christ allusions ("he sent his only son to save the…

Plastic Man isn't about stories. He's a Looney Tunes character dropped into DC's universe.

Aquaman: Deep Six

I hate Iggy Azalea's…sonic blackface? Vocal minstrelsy? Audio racism? What do you call the thing that she does that makes her awful?

I think the issue here is that NBC appears to be making decisions based on the idea that the show is going to be marketed to a specific group of middle-class straight white male viewers. The appeal of less-popular, "dark and edgy" comic book heroes like Constantine had (presumably) been the inclusion of "adult" themes…

Broad City should have been nominated for best performance at least. They nominated Taylor Schilling for best actress in a comedy, and while a talented actress, Schilling is not and never has been funny. Pretty much every actress on OITNB is funnier than she is.

Look at what was on network television the first year SNL was on:

Crystal Gravy - like Wavy Gravy, but translucent and pork-flavored.

The lore is a jumbled mess that's been restarted a dozen times. No interesting recurring characters, no unique settings, no large-scale ongoing conflicts. One story is about fairies and giants, one is about conspiracies in a megacity, another is a vaguely East African war epic, another is dystopian sci-fi. For the…

Mighty Will to Power Rangers