This is what happens when a bunch of old dudes want to get in a dick-measuring contest, but no one wants to actually drop their drawers and show off their dead flaccid wieners.

Let’s not exploit this politically. I’ll just send my thoughts and prayers instead.

Every time I read a quote from Kyrie I become more convinced that he never actually set foot in a classroom at Duke

“...his entire vocabulary of multisyllabic words is operated by a lotto machine.”

Right because Uber makes any sense at all. Sorry man, I have an MBA, and Uber’s valuation is baffling. People are setting fire to barrels of money in the hope that somehow they will eventually manage to remove the human element (drivers) and build a giant fleet of autonomous cars while also staying ahead of everybody…

Real estate brokers, working in cahoots with banks and governments, redlined the country and kept segregation going even until now. In short, nobody cares what you think.

This is what’s happening. Her husband works from home. I guarantee this woman doesn’t fart in the presence of her husband. Her husband has put her on this pedestal to where she feels she can’t shit in her own house. Instead, she goes out for a “jog.”

Andy Murray is a UNICEF ambassador but did Laura even mention his charity work? Nope. Really makes you question whether Laura really cares about the article or she’s just doing the least amount.

So the Red Sox are still stealing signs then?

For my 600 person apartment, there are 2 chargers. For my 12,000 person company there are 15 chargers.

“This is fine.”

He should go with some tried and true baseballisms, like “Hustle, Grit, Humble”. On second thought, that’s probably too long, so he should probably just abbreviate it.

Remember the old days when you had to spend the night in a physical line in front of the local record store that served as your area Ticketmaster outlet to get tickets for a concert?

Pretty sure. If its a Highlander, there can be only one.

For Audi, VIN stands for Vehicles w/ Identical Numbers

If the Mets medical staff were in charge in Barcelona the headline would be, “13 People Run Over in Barcelona Expected to Be Good to Go Tomorrow.”

Dom, this is a hit job. Happy Gilmore is a respected journalist who, like our president, both is an award-winning golfer and tells it like it is.

You’d think Jeter would be a little more understanding about keeping around a fan-favorite statue in the field.

I mean this is all some evil genius plan right? Like he knows Mayweather is looking at this clip and is just trolling us all?

This feels like a win-win.