Meet you all back here in 11 minutes?

UEFA: "It will be okay for Russian football teams and Ukrainian football teams to be pitted against one another despite the current situation."
Plane: [goes down]
UEFA: "Okay, okay. Wow. Russian and Ukrainian football teams will not be permitted to play against each other."
Plane: [gets back up; is totally fine]

A proctologist is getting into his Porsche when he notices that one of his tires looks low.

my favorite:

Basically Eisfussball Pokal with sticks and a disc. Also one of the few sports whose relationships with pro clubs/national teams is remotely comparable.

today, the US is a legit top 16 team, but not a top 8 — and the last two games illustrated how big the gap is between 1-8 and 9-16.

There is never a time in which chanting "USA" is inappropriate.

the call was correct

Doug Murray may be a statue on the ice, but if any of the Habs players was at "fault" on that goal it was Weaver.

Given the rise in animal advocates, and the ever-growing influence of groups like PETA, I was wondering your stance on this question regarding a powerful and timely topic - In your professional opinion, a hot dog on a bun is technically a sandwich. Right?

As a protest, I heard only 3/5 of the Clippers will play at one time.

I'd like to hear the story he told after the question "For the record, how do you spell your last name?"

I don't hate Texas, I'm from there. So I agree! It would be great! That's why they need to change the laws to let people buy the cars they want and lure a potentially lucrative factory to the state.

and i thought most arizonians were vehemently anti-beaner.

Wasn't the Demichelis red given for denying an obvious goal-scoring opportunity? It certainly wasn't "violent" but he obviously did trip Messi and thereby prevented him from scoring.

Born in Halifax, lived in Toronto since I was four. Canadian beer, for the most part, sucks.

that appears to be a Russian hockey player stealing a pretty ice skater from the defeated Canadian hockey team