“The Pirates of the Caribbean star said he decided to start writing a memoir on an old typewriter to cope with his post-divorce depression as he toured with his band, Hollywood Vampires.

The happiest nights of my life are when all the bands on the bill, or at least all the local bands are using the same drum kit. That shaves 15 minutes off the change over between bands right there.

The 15 minute changeover is the thing that most bands can’t seem to handle. The number of times I’ve seen bands do their entire setup and teardown on-stage, at half speed, mixed with bullshitting with their friends after the set, is fucking nuts. I’ve always done a pre-setup and full teardown in the gear stash area…

As a fan of both of those trash bands, I could try to convince you, but music is subjective, and I get why people don’t like it. I’ll just say to each his own and leave it at that.

The Catholic Church was asking for it when they invited Buress to perform. It’s the church’s fault, and they need to repent for what they’ve done and then they need to be quiet about it because no one will believe them anyway.

And I’m sure that’s exactly what she was trying to say in between her Pall Mall-tainted spittle attacks.

If anything, this year’s Super Bowl is evidence of how valuable having a quarterback who can catch the ball is.

“He takes a shit on The Beatles. (“...They were the worst musicians in the world.”) He takes an even bigger shit on U2:”

Las Cruces Represent!

“These are some kind of new Mexicans, they are trying to beat us at our own games and now they’re invading the states of Utah and Arizona.”

Breaking Glad: New Mexico State Wins First Bowl Game in 57 Year

The Blake’s Lotaburger in Las Cruces is going to be hopping tonight. Free shakes for everyone!

I found this book impossible to finish, so if she lifted anything from someone, she should have picked someone else.

Dak was exposed in the 1st Philly game last year, Vikes, and Giants. Focus on the run and make him beat you through the air with his arm. He can’t do it, his accuracy is shit and he has no confidence because of it. The message just got out to other teams this year.

All of these are terrible and will piss off your Barista, who will see right through you immediately and not let you do it a second time. Don’t ask for free shit, don’t abuse the cream carafe, and stop trying to fucking hack everything.

just a quick piece of advice, if I may. This is not about you, but this is where we just shut up and listen to what is being said.

You might be a (hipster) racist if you and your friends like to have a night on the town playing dress-up from an era where black people had no rights (20s, 60s Mad Men isht)...and it ain’t Halloween.

Thank god y’all added the A.V. Club so that you could open the two-pronged road-to-bankruptcy-via-defamation-lawsuit offensive.