You’re confusing the how with the why. It’s like saying the real reason I went to the shops wasn’t because I needed milk, but because I was sitting in my car while the wheels turned.

They felt sufficiently burdened to cancel it after two awesome seasons.

Er, no. Fanboy Spielberg shoehorning his entirely out-of-place Kubrick homage into an otherwise fun movie did no-one any favours. That was 20 minutes of tone-deaf hero-worship that could have been spent servicing the plot, exploring the genuine 80's video game nostalgia of the book.

Glasses shmasses. Where does he shop for clothes?! Ten outfits? Does he have a personal tailor who specializes in relaxed but outdoorsy casual wear?

You see, a woman with time on her hands would be called “Deborah”. But busy women, they don’t have time for those barely-pronounced letters!

*Garfield director Zang Yimou

Perhaps he looks Hollywood-still-wants-to-get-hiredy.

OK, but B+ for spelling, right?

Tolkien’s work is full of humour, particularly wherever hobbits enter the picture. The man who invented Second Breakfast was full of warm wit. If you want dry tales of good versus evil, look to his (chiefly American) imitators.

There’s a lesson for future shows looking to cast a young Batman: find an actor with tall parents, and feed him protein shakes till someone calls Child Services.

The wake word is the name of your first pet, followed by your children’s birthdays.

And for $6 actual billion, you’d think they could do better than Mark Wahlberg. I’m pretty sure I could get Matt Damon for $6B.

MORNING SPOILERS

I can’t speak for those people, but Cho is 5ft 10 and a hundred years old. So it’s a bit left-field for Spike.

I like John Cho. But this is super-weird casting.

I agree that metaphor and subtext are not in any way a part of fiction, and that every time you tell a joke you should say “Dat’s da joke” in an Austrian accent, just to make sure the audience gets it.

It’s pronounced “BigbooTAY”!

You’ve seen Rogue One right? Dark Forces was that, only Cassian was called Kyle and Jyn was called Jan. The movie ends just before restoring to the last save point.

So I don’t get it. Does “bake off” mean something sexual in American? Or is it racist?

Let’s say you hire Nicolas Cage, for example. To play Superman. Is Nicolas Cage a bad actor? Don’t say “sometimes”. No he’s not a bad actor. Is there a universe where he delivers a Superman people will want to see? Sure. Not this universe.