Yeah, yeah, yeah. NP. I’m here because the Raymond Babbit in me is fixated on the house. Why did the owner park it in front of his grandparents house and why did they bring the shades from their previous house they bought in 1946? And they aren’t aligned, definitely, definitley, not aligned.

My mind races...

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Ok. Now is the time. That terrible photo of you the one time you tried a banana hammock? Cardboard blowup just inside the open garage. Your questionable sex toy collection? Hung on a clothesline at the top of the door. Your Andy Warhol tribute art depicting HOA board members seductively devouring various meat…

I would watch the hell out of anything that featured Jessica Chastain as Ginger.

LiAngelo probably thought the shopkeepers would be just like LaVar and not pay any attention to him.

I will buy this for him, and then drive it myself. He can drive the minivan.

Remember the old days when you had to spend the night in a physical line in front of the local record store that served as your area Ticketmaster outlet to get tickets for a concert?

I’m disappointed in the Jalopnik commentariat. This is the most correct answer:

I think I’d go with GoldHammer but then again, I’m no marketing genius—just a simple man with a talent for naming dildos.

I’m gonna buy this jag so I can pick up some cougars!

Cash only?!? Can you say “you are bout to get robbed!”

Sorry, for that kind of money I am not buying some ‘roided out SUV that Guy Fieri probably already owns in yellow.

Dunno, if I had this car I’d plan on taking the Merritt Parkway sometime when it wasn’t horribly crowded. Then the only thing I’d have to worry about would be a speeding ticket.

A front loaded NFL contract that they had no intention of honoring? They must have thought the NIH was a player.

*receives pink slips*

“NFL disbursed $7.8 billion in national revenue—a 9.6 percent increase from the previous year.”

Tiger Woods, Florida Man.

The Yankees Are Struggling To Put Butts In Seats