It would be fucking amazing if they actually went the year scoreless. That would be the greatest record in sports history.

SCHEFTER: I’ll tell you this. He is a real stand up guy. Completely genuine.
PATRICK: But do you think he did it?
SCHEFTER: Does it matter? I mean, if you came in to my house and put a gun to my head, while I was on a radio interview answering questions about you...Er...Hardy and told me I HAD to answer. Then, gun to…

“Hello, friends! Which one of you wants to pull really hard on my necktie while I jerk myself off to completion?”

At least they get to watch Raptors lose in the playoffs.

The only American thing we got was commercials. And victory.

Please please please let all the entrances actually lead to moving vans headed for the coast to deposit them on pilotless garbage barges.

Everyone seems to have this photo gaffe under control... so, let’s try:

True cycling fans dispose cheater’s body on the spot.

I’m glad the other guy took the W, if only because i have no idea how to pronounce Wgwiazdowski

It ain’t the heat, it’s the humility.

I’ll tell you what you’re missing: Religious organizations do not get to make the laws.

You cannot be serious.

High humidity intolerance +1

Sigh.

That’s why I prefer Arizona over Georgia. It’s the dry hate.

Ironic when you consider that the Falcons new stadium is basically a giant anus that looks like it’s ready for a nice big penis when the roof “opens”.

Even if it sometimes stretches into strange places.

No one reminds me more of India Arie than this lady.