Better:

Who can forget “I smell burnt toast!” and then there was the SCTV version.

I only found out very recently that Canadian Heritage Minutes was the brainchild of Charles Bronfman — yes, one of those Bronfmans — stemming from his wish to start a Canadian legacy project as part of his philanthropic efforts. The first ones, a series of 13 in English and French, aired 25 years ago in 1991.

I am having secondhand rage for you.

Based on the online and late night cable documentaries I have seen, yes.

I guess you’re saying this swimsuit is “Very niiice”?

Is there an app for that?

People managed to go to live events for decades without phones. They’ll live.

Those of us trying to watch the show will not miss you, I can assure you of that. Catch the dvd and text your bae from the couch if you really need to.

Hey Bobby-

“So glad to hear you are feeling better, sorry our Fit Tea gave you explosive diarrhea.”

Hey Bobby-

I’m not even sure it is safe for the environment.

i’m becoming more of a lucille with each passing day

It’s like this incident, too:

I fucking adored Mordecai. She can have half the proceeds from my movie ticket. And I rented it on Redbox but forgot to return it for a couple of days, so, there’s another $1.50 right there...

Man, if I was Johnny Depp I'm not sure I'd even date without paperwork.

Same. I’m obsessed with the updates but refuse to go to their actual pages. I’m mostly here for the hilarious comments. Like, I’ll read the update and then go away for a few hours to wait for a good comment build up and save it like a little treat for myself.

It’s all fun and games until every social construct breaks down and someone is murdered for the conch.