*Cue Benedict Cumberbatch, in a very special guest appearance, strangling Jim Parsons while screaming "You should have let me sleep!" *

*Ben Jonson angrily dispatches Francis Bacon's address*

Nonsense. Trump is very well-versed in all the nuances of Roe V. Wade, he simply wants to keep you in suspense.

I'd rather be dead in D.C. than alive in Trump Tower.

*Werner Herzog furiously tweets out Lee Child's address*

At long last, the Supper Club has provided a reason to justify its existence.

Sad!

Watching the first debate was enjoyable purely for getting to see Trump have a mini-meltdown on national television. Watching the second debate, however, was just depressing, especially as that flailing idiot kept dragging the proceedings into evermore sordid situations. And no, you weren't the only one who thought…

That poor old man; I would have gone on the treasure hunt with him. And as expected, Anthony Hopkins can bring out the music in certain lines like few others can. Subtleties indeed. That, and seeing him completely demolish Sizemore's cheap, lurid storyline made my night.

He's less White Tower and more Lidless Eye Wreathed In Flame.

We needed a John Connor and instead we got a Trump. Skynet never looked so appealing.

America, start your screaming!

What I took from this is that Trump needs to take Pence furniture shopping so that he can be shown graphic video of That Mexican Thing. Oh, and they're both disgusting, worthless pieces of filth.

Oh, don't worry about it, A.V. Club. As soon as you step outside that door, you'll start feeling better. You'll remember you don't believe in any of this fate crap. You're in control of your own life, remember? Here, take a cookie.

Hiring Matt Damon to play Tim Kaine, however, was inspired.

He's still mad that no one's bothered to call him yet.

These sequels keep getting more and more outrageous. I just hope the final movie ends well.

This time, it's for real!

As someone whose girlfriend is Vietnamese, I've got three words for you, Watters: Go fuck yourself. Actually, let me rephrase that: Fuck you, fuck that racist hack Bill O'Reilly, fuck Donald Trump for wanting to send me and mine to the wall, and fuck the horse you rode in on. Apologies for the rant, folks. Just needed…

Walter and Peter Bishop from Fringe, hands down.