Nah...order Jack Daniels and a Mountain Dew (preferably a double) ......show her you're a man with impeccable taste!

No...a blow job in a phone booth (if you can even find a phone booth these days) should be step #1.

Whoa man! Let's back off a little bit here. I agree...use whores...no muss, no fuss and you're likely to get a lot more interesting time with your clothes off than with some 'proper' woman you met online. But don't even think about killing yourself at 40....there's a whole generation of whores who love older guys and…

What she's saying...without actually saying it.....is that your bed-frame better be real sturdy and able to stand up to 2 - 3 hours of energetic fucking once the coffee date is over. Nothing kills a budding relationship like have a bed collapse on you and pinning your dick between the mattress and one of the bed slats.

Try meeting people in real life rather than relying on the Internet. Much more classy!

Basic attitude toward all of this ...WHO REALLY GIVES A FUCKING SHIT????

I guess you're one of those guys that like getting a loogie in your food! Good luck with that.

I go to a diner in a small town just across the border, every Saturday morning about 7:30am - best steak and eggs I've ever had. This diner has very nice waitresses, very pretty, very efficient and generally just real nice girls. There is a group of older men who come in about the same time and while they are…

Maybe teenagers today don't know Paul McCartney (the least spectacular of the Beatles in my humble opinion) but they sure as hell don't know some one-legged cunt who has been little more than a money-grubbing whore her entire life!

He's probably using it to fuck the Nigerian princess who said she would marry me and shower me with love and give me half of her dead father's $47 million.

Well therein lies the real problem..."before going to jail for a long time"! What should happen is that these fucktards get pumped with about 20 - 20 bullets as they lie in the street. It's a lot cheaper to pay for extra ammo than to put these people through the system and then support them for an extended jail…

Yeah...a great 'moment of fame', just seconds before they're ugly-ass body gets pumped with about 20 bullets. Anybody who wants to copy-cat that isn't the type of person we need in this world anyways.

Let's give these TV news reporters a lot of credit. Not once did they use the term 'nigger', 'beaner', or 'fucking piece of shit' to describe the bad guy in this piece. Hard not to do when the evidence is so obvious.

There's fucking two of everything in Athens, Ohio...including good looking girls.

OK......I'll give you a pass this one time, but as a resident of NYC you should be hip to the fact that when people in the know use he word 'bagels' they're not talking about the bread product, they're really making reference to the bagel-shaped knot that is the opening to every NYC chick's asshole. They're being…

All that means is that Guinness makes you shit up a storm...because everybody knows that we all carry about 20 -25 pounds of backed up shit in our systems (check the john Wayne autopsy records if you don't believe me).

Maybe so, but I'm willing to bet a fair bit that she got her ass banged pretty good back in the green room prior to the show....that's why her brain was so addled during the game.

No, please...don't ever send him back here! We have enough fucking problems.

The ultimate Jeopardy answer - "Alex Trebek"

Yeah the ultimate Jeopardy answer "Alex Trebek"