Now for Dan Gilbert's reaction:

@Demon Deacon Blues: According to John "Hot Rod" Williams, yes, yes you do.

@SynicVance2.0: True. All I really care about is that after two years of nobody giving a fuck about the Heat I'll have to fight one to two hours of fairweather gridlock every goddamn home game.

@SynicVance2.0: So do I. Sure it can claim it. It's not valid, but it can.

@SynicVance2.0: AA Arena is in no way on South Beach; it's on Biscayne Boulevard in downtown Miami, or right next to downtown Miami, zip code 33132.

@Its_Jetertastic: According to every telecast of a Miami sporting contest I've ever seen, Landshark Stadium (or whatever it is now), AA Arena, and the former Orange Bowl are/were all located just off Ocean Drive.

leave or stay im probably selling my james memorbilla

Am I seeing things? There's a black guy on the German team?

@David Hume: Kitten pouncing on a ray of sunshine.

@TrojanBrand: Replace "A female Phish fan" with "Female Phish fans" and see if that gets it closer to the spirit of what I was trying to convey, which is there is no way "manicured lawns" are standard fare at Phish shows. Yeah, I botched it.

We laugh and I say this is standard fare at most Phish shows I've been to . . . slowly pulls up the g-string, giving everyone a wonderful view of her manicured lawn.

How to End Up With a Girl Like Megan Fox

@CassandraSays: I think Irin is a woman, incidentally.

Jesus. Not gonna get any better than that.

I'm more interested in Susan Ivanova's gruesome medical experiments on the Wonder Twins.

Women Who Made Summer Hotter

Born unto a generation of fans who've known naught but utter sports failure and despair

Cleveland changed the uniforms for Lebron, who requested a golden sword with which to pierce the hearts of Northeast Ohio.

That's why it's better for me to be quiet . . .

@Steve U: While the original (Platonic) escort chained all the Knicks fans to seats in MSG, never realizing that the shadows cast upon the court before them were the closest they would ever come to seeing a real basketball team.