What a shame. That orange sled was one retard-free sledding party away from retirement.

I don't know if any of this makes you worse than Paul Shirley, but I do know that this reminds me of the Spanish national basketball team's attempt to raise awareness of China's artificial currency devaluation.

Walk-on Matt Simms is charged with assaulting a man that he thought was responsible for stomping teammate Rob Beard last week.

@Drunken Midgets: This is the happiest mugshot ever:

@skahammer: I tried to like him. I really did. He's got some great ideas, it's just that the execution of those ideas is infuriating. I hated literally every character in White Noise to the point of rooting against them while simultaneously praying for the book to end.

Anybody still care what Matthew Stafford is doing?

the Super Bowl week arrest watch goes into effect.

Anybody else out there watching the Pro Bowl (anyone?) notice Land Shark Stadium playing Pennywise's Bro Hymn after Jones Drew's touchdown?

I haven't seen a more humiliating beating at the hands of an old man since Nolan Ryan vs. Robin Ventura.

You can also classify Mao II as writing that sucks and, as with most Delillo books, unlikeable characters that neither the reader nor the writer give a fuck about.

Amon Carter? I knew it was 2 Good 2 B True.

. . . because if all this talk of OBP, OPS, UZR, DRS and PMR was really only about ATM . . .

I don't leave anything in the chamber.

Megan Fox is kissable. You heard it here first.

I see Jack's rejection by Kylie Jenner was so crushing he's entered his obligatory Robert Smith phase.

I haven't seen a Mancunian so devastated since the IRA stopped by for a visit back in '96.

Sources close to Bridge say he is "in bits" after hearing about the alleged affair.

@ClintonPortishead: You could also say that's what stymied that Armstrong for a couple of years.

Making money off of hitting a whore in the face with a golf club? I hope they plan on paying royalties to Elin.

Tiger Woods hasn't physically hurt or abused anybody.