I mean, she’s not the only one by far. (God bless in particular the lady on my cousin’s facebook who literally thought she’d discover “native blood” that would allow her to get “tribal money”)

you know if this were five years ago I would have chosen early death by a mile, but children change a woman. I have to make sure that they survive and are cared for. So I guess I would actually fuck either of these walking, blinking moneybags.

I do on the other hand know a ton of people who have taken ancestry tests hoping to find out that they have “Native American blood”. (Narrator: They did not.)

yes

oh NO WONDER. I had been wondering why that ship stays afloat. 

Fuck off.

it’s messed up to go back and look at all the smooth/baby-faced male leads cast in his big movies. I would worry about Brandon Routh (I unfortunately loved Superman Returns) but I think he was probably too old to be Singer’s type?

Hey Russ: Fucking learn to be better at it you pusillanimous shitstain. Your wife wasn’t born knowing how to run a household. She fucking learned. Study and learn and get the fuck better.

He’s already a conservative meme. His face will be on t-shirts within the week. The next generation of Fox grifters is ready.

They should really update the label on the product in the header image.

I just have no frame of reference for it at all! And that’s probably just fine. I recognize that it requires an immense amount of skill and comfort with/enjoyment of one’s own body, which is probably what I’m lacking, lmao

I have tried to watch that video twice, realized that I am an old pearl-clutching biddy who cannot be Hip with The Kids, and gave up. Alexa, explain “twerking”.

imagine literally anyone asking this addled lipoma for his further thoughts on the hottest young couple of the moment

Also has anyone considered that this Robert Patterson person may have gotten the job because Trump thought that he was someone else....???

soooooooooooooooo this whole letter slapfight nonsense is whatever but... can the President actually cancel travel by a member of Congress? Does he have that authority???

I have this problem! Hopefully buy thing online, it arrives but doesn’t fit ideally, I keep it for a couple of months and then donate it anyway. Whereas my success/sparks-joy rate for in-person shopping is like... 75-100%.

lmao what experts

I’m confused- if semen is so great for women, why are chodes like this always telling us to keep our legs closed?

hahaha jesus this is amazing

You might have to unpack that for me, Guh-nat-Buh.