I second the guy who suggested Cardinal of the Kremlin holds up OK.

Dwight is unquestionably a libertarian.

I know three Patriots fans. One is from Boston—fair enough, you would think!—but is also a Yankees fan, so fuck him. One is from Orange County (CA) so you might feel bad for him since two NFL teams left town during his life, but he’s also a Lakers fan and rooted for the Steelers in 2006, so double fuck him. The third…

If the answer here isn’t a CPO AWD Lexus or Volvo (it is), isn’t it something reasonably sporty? Like, even if your motivation is keeping up with the Joneses, you don’t have to have something fancy if you have it because it’s fun to drive. Even the Joneses understand that. Get a WRX or something.

Only other pants I had were these Family Guy PJ bottoms

I watched the Beastquake game in a bar in Phoenix with a coworker who is a Saints fan. Really nice guy usually. Barely spoke to me for several days after that game and kicked me out of his fantasy league the next year. Saints fans are the pettiest in the league.

Kansas City, Missouri has this perception that we’re the new “cool city” to move to/visit.

“When seagulls follow the trawler it is because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea.” - Eric Cantona 

Painting the grille vantablack too would have helped a lot.

Romo was also two weeks short of 37 years old when he retired and had played for 14 seasons. The idea that his retirement was at all premature is insane to me.

Romo retired two weeks before his 37th birthday after 14 seasons, after losing his starting job. Andrew Luck retired at 29 after 7 seasons. Injury problems prompted both of their retirements, but how are they otherwise remotely comparable? How much longer do you think Romo could or should have been expected to play?

The other dominant thread in Billy’s soccer writing is a complete lack of knowledge or fact-checking, like the time he referred to world-famous center back Ledley fucking King as a forward in an article about Spurs.

The reason Billy’s soccer articles get so many nasty comments is that every single article is either a contrarian hot take or demonstrates that he doesn’t actually know the first fucking thing about the sport. Compare the comment section on one of Luis’s soccer articles: completely different.

Have you never seen a picture of Barron? He’s Donald Trump’s kid, alright. Looks more like Donald than any of the other Trump kids.

Of course, Piech was Austrian...

I bet Nick Foles’ dick isn’t even really that big. Northeast Philly is just the Deep South with rowhomes and shittier food. The least surprising thing I’ve ever heard is when Marchman got his trash cans stolen.

I would definitely read Why Your Car Sucks: Volkswagen.

Goddammit. Starred. I’ll delete mine if you want.

Do you think the chonky cat would enjoy bopping in the country, or fishing in a stream? Anyway, I think a change is gonna do him good.