Things I love about this:

You know, I don't know what the problems with it being basically an extended Twilight Zone episode. I mean…so what? It was well-acted, well-shot, and entertaining enough. It was no masterpiece, and it didn't stick the landing quite as well as it might have, but I don't see any inherent problem with a film taking what…

Nah, bruh.

Florida fucking sucks, brah.

Sony's crack marketing department scores yet another win with Passengers. Good work, guys. You're definitely not the most incompetent major film studio out there. Definitely not.

Suicide Squad is my 1. Just terrible on every level. I tried watching it stoned, just to see if maybe it was a good high-off-your-ass kind of movie, and it still sucked.

Auto-tune is art!!

Yeah… I think it's time to kill the Internet.

I've been convinced for a while now that Erica isn't really Australian. Or named Erica. I remember at some point she slipped effortlessly into a perfect American accent or something, and another character commented on it, and she just kind of shrugged. She's definitely a serial killer, or something.

The episode was absurdly mediocre, but the Mr. Slave scene was spectacular.

So, yeah, I'm starting to think it's about time someone finds a way to just kill the fucking Internet. It's not worth it anymore.

The first trailer perfectly established the romantic/flirty thing without beating the audience over the head with it. Adding a stupid pop song and cutting the third trailer like the movie is being released in 1998 instead of 2016 shows a near remarkable lack of understanding of modern audiences.

I think this might be the film that gets everyone questioning just how bankable Jennifer Lawrence is.

Sony's marketing fucking baffles me. Remember Amazing Spider-Man 2? Remember how many trailers and clips they released in the weeks leading up to the film's release? They oversold it to the point of absurdity (and in the process gave away like, a third of the movie.)

Nah. I'm just going to make fun of you because you don't seem to realize that no one except morons will take what you have to say seriously if you look like you write at the same level as a third grader.

Punctuation is your friend.

Her haircut.

I am embarrassed to say that I saw the movie, heard the line, went out for a few drinks, and then joined the Marines.

Did Kevin Millar write a comic where the villain has the hero's son's sperm forcibly put in the hero's daughter so that the hero will have a grandchild of both rape and incest?

This is Mark Millar's face while he's fucking you in the ass.