Worked for the Joker.

Eh, about $8.99.

How do you know if you’re a pirate?

I’m sorry, but I totally agree with you.

It’s funny you suggest that. Many moons ago when I first started to lose my hair, I did the bandana thing. I was visiting a friend in Colorado and we went hiking in the rockies and I had one on because it was sunny. Skipping ahead, I forgot that the sun was stronger and I was burned from the eyebrows down. I looked…

BUT AT WHAT COST?!?!?!

Totally reminded me of that Amy Schumer skit where the women can’t stop apologizing, “sorry but...”

Same for people that say “just saying.” I know what you are saying because you said it asshole.

And skin cancer is way preferable to autism, at least to these dinguses. As someone who is pretty much gonna get skin cancer if I so much as look outside for too long (dark hair + very pale skin combo, yay for being paler than the palest shade of foundations grr) I am a bit obsessive with suntan lotion. Mmm factor 50…

Do you know where I can get some free-range yak testicles? Asking for a friend.

Get out of here with your heathen “science”!

Please, you know unicorn farts are comprised of chemicals and toxins! What an irresponsible thing to say.

Um, hello. Organic unicorn farts, and free-range angel tears.

unicorn farts, angel tears, and positive thinking

Bear in mind the pain of that burn the next time you think you can prevent the flu with yak testicles or whatever you idiots believe nowadays.

But it might give mah behbeh de Autizms!!!

Stop science-ing on these pearl clutchers.

I used Alba’s sunscreen and I got a sunburn.

This is particularly funny because, even by the standards of the “chemicals are scary” crowd, there’s nothing terribly “artificial” about zinc oxide. Zinc is a mineral, it's mined out of the ground, either as metallic zinc or as a component of various ores. You heat it up until it vaporizes, and it reacts with oxygen…

It’s almost like the active ingredients actively do something! It’s almost like Banana Boat isn’t trying to poison your children.