Go see the first stage of the Saturn V and tell me how you get that back without breaking it.

This is why Jalops like wagons.

Jerry Seinfeld’s lawyer wants a word with you...

Prompt wasn’t best seats for your minivan.

The best.

We do. Available turbo, a wagon, not-shit quality, comfortable a.f., available awd, no pretense, and polarizing styling. It’s pretty goddamn jalop.

I’ve met Henry III a couple of times on mutual projects and he’s super humble/chill. No hint of “Don’t you know WHO I am?” at all. Very much a “Hey what’s up? I’m Henry.” type of guy. I like him. 

Yeah, and I’m guessing an MBA at MIT is no cake walk.

Fuck Musk and fuck Tesla. We were their target market and need a replacement set of wheels. Won’t even consider them now. We don’t spend our money with businesses with policies that skew right-wing crazy. Hobby Lobby, the Chicken place, Walmart and many others completely lost our business years ago. Tesla, thanks to…

He is not even a savant, just a rich boy who failed up with dads apartheid money

Considering that I hate society and commuting, I’ve honestly never been better

I talked to Rory on the phone for an hour two weeks ago. I told him about all of you. He knows your SSN, mother’s maiden name, town you were born in, your SO’s favorite ice cream. Do not fuck with him.

But your point is not lost on me.

“It’s spelled ‘Luxury Yacht’ but it’s pronounced ‘Throatwobbler Mangrove.’”

You know, I don’t get all judge-y over “alternative” folks being all alternative (my feeling is: to each their own so long as it doesn’t negatively affect anyone else), but I will call out pretentious, idiotic bullshit when I see it. I see it here...in spades...and in droves. I’m sick of rich assholes seeking…

Elon Musk is not a genius. It’s a billion to one shot he ever got his company (somewhat) functional, and you will never convince me it wasn’t just incredible luck. This poor kid has two morons for parents who are going to treat him like a science experiment. 

Narrator: you’re a fuckrard

Treadmille Miglia

Horsepower is torque over time.